Isn’t that a hard thing to do? I say that all the time. Mostly because I’m a bit of a control freak. But also because I can occasionally doubt God is working for my good. Not intentionally, but that’s pretty much what is happening when you take control out of his hands, right? You don’t think he is doing good for you, or noticing your struggles, so you try to do good for yourself. You think you can do it a little better, or a little faster, or make a little more money if you do it this way. Maybe he’s just a little too busy right now. Maybe his focus is on something more important than your situation, so while you’re waiting on your answer, you go ahead and move onwards and upwards. We all do this, whether consciously or not. In our thinking, we often times acquaint ourselves with that old saying, time is money. So we take this belief as truth. It trumps over God’s patience and promises.
Now I’m not saying that everytime we step out of God’s will, it results in a terrible catastrophe. But I am saying that when we wait on God, God provides. And you know what I’ve found? Usually, if I would have waited and not rushed into something, I could have gotten a better deal out of it.
Our goal in this life is to live in a way that we put God first. And when I first heard this, I was like, uh no. Thanks, but I’ve got too much going on. I can’t even think about that. I can’t take the time to read that bible, I don’t understand it. I need someone to tell me what they think about it. It takes too much time to sit down and pray. I can do it tomorrow.
Have you ever heard these excuses before? Have you said these things to yourself to justify why you just can’t? I have. And things were ok. I survived. I worked and we lived. But life never really got great. I was tired, I was always worrying, always anxious, stressed, yelling at my kids because I was too tired and worn out to deal with appropriate discipline. Isn’t it shameful to read that? It’s shameful for me to admit it. Because even though we were doing ok on the outside, inside, I felt like everything was too much. I couldn’t keep up with work, life, and family.
I had to do something different. I needed a change in my life. Bad. Right about the time I was going through this, is when that movie came out. War Room. And man oh man. Let me just say wow. I didn’t realize. I just didn’t know what God could do for us. For me. For my sense of direction. If you’ve never seen this movie, you need to watch it.
I didn’t really know how to apply what I saw at first. The following morning I figured I’d start out by trying to pray. I gave myself 20 minutes. I woke up before the kids and sat in my closet. And my closet is FULL of clothes. It isn’t that nice, neat closet like the woman had in the movie, lol. It’s a tiny small closet crammed full of things. I sat on a tote full of scrapbooking supplies because it was more comfortable than the many shoes, hangers, and old toys scattered across the floor.
At first I just kind of sat there. Not really knowing what to say. Which was actually kind of nice because I’d been going full steam ahead for so long, I hadn’t realize how long it had been since I’ve heard peace and quiet, or since I’ve just been still.
Slowly, thoughts started coming to my mind. The ones that didn’t have anything to do with God I let go. But when a thought about God came up, I really tried to focus on it and hang on to it. And I started to wonder about God. What is he really like? Does he honestly even like us, we are all so bad sometimes. How can I do what he wants from me? What does he want from me? And I came to the realization that I did not have any of those answers. And that made me really sad. I mean, I was a Christian. I believed in Jesus and I wanted to go to heaven. I wasn’t a terrible person, there were many other people who did things far worse than me, so I should be good, right. How wrong my thinking was.
It really bothered me I didn’t know what God wanted from me. I reflected on my thoughts all day after my prayer attempt that morning. I finally realized the importance of reading that bible. The one that sometimes gives me a headache. The very same one I made all those excuses for not reading. But I knew in my heart that is what God wanted. He wants us to know him like he knows every fiber and being in us. He wants a true relationship, and those are not one sided.
This is what prompted me to start actually reading. And to be honest. It probably took a couple weeks of picking it up, reading some, and putting it back down, going to youtube to see what I could find preached on whatever I was trying to read to figure out what it was trying to say. But I stayed persistent and I didn’t give up. And then, while I was reading, it started to click. I realized that it was applicable to my life. I could see why, if people internalized this, it changed them. And I’ve been reading ever since.
I don’t think you could ever read the complete bible one time and get everything you need to know from it. I think it depends on Gods influence on you at the time you’re reading it. I’ve read the same passage several times, and depending on what I was going through, I had gotten different convictions out of it that helped me through my circumstances. I think it was made to keep coming back to time and time again. Like a life manual. And I think God intended it to be this way.
I just want to take the time, right now, to encourage you. Wherever you are on your faith journey, keep going. Don’t give up, no matter your circumstances. Put control back in Gods hands. How do you do that ? Read your bible. Start to know God and read about his promises to you. Believe these promises and believe in Jesus. Believe in his ultimate sacrifice for you. Just. Don’t. Stop. Sometimes as Christians, we can be stagnant for a little while, or even backslide, but don’t let that deter you from coming back to HIM. God is so patient. He is giving us this time to choose to come back to him. Know this. I pray for all of you out there reading this. I hope it helps.
“Do not be anxious about anything, but in every situation, by prayer and petition, with thanksgiving, present your requests to God. And the peace of God, which transcends all understanding, will guard your hearts and your minds in Christ Jesus.”
Read more at http://www.beliefnet.com/faiths/christianity/articles/8-bible-verses-that-remind-us-god-is-in-control.aspx#PxCVQz8HVeUSVgZe.99